I Give My Soul To Keep x Katherine

[katherine rivera]

“It’s not,” / “Kat, this isn’t your fault. This is me. This is all me, being a complete asshole, and being childish.” / “It’s a stupid habit I have. Ever since I was a teenager, I’ve tried to solve all my problems with alcohol. It usually made me feel better. But after you left…I started drinking, and no matter how much I drank, I just didn’t feel any better. So I kept going. I guess…I guess my ultimate goal, was, I’m sorry to say, to drink myself to death. Because my life wasn’t worth living if you weren’t in it.”

The feeling of his palm against hers, his fingers enlaced with hers, was such a wonderful feeling. To most, this would be something small, but to Katherine - it was big. The smallest touch was the biggest, it seemed. Everything, slowly, was beginning to feel right. "...well, if you've been drinking these two whole months, you better do a detox before you go back to usual drinking - to get every ounce of alcohol you have in you out, first,", she said, sighing a bit, "... and I am here now... here to stay, so - live your life, please."

“You don’t need to make up anything,” / “You don’t have to do a damn thing. You don’t have to fix anything. You being here, is fixing it. This is it. This is all I need.”

Milo leaned in and touched his lips to hers; a quick and gentle gesture. Though quick, it was savory, as this contact was one of the first in what seemed like ages. That momentary touch of his lips on hers gave Katherine a slight case of goosebumps. As soon as he had pulled back, Milo went in for another kiss; this kiss, more deep and passionate. He dipped her back as he deepened the kiss.

Katherine's heart fluttered in her chest; her stomach simply filled with those good kind of butterflies - it was mindblowing, as were many of Milo's kisses, but this one took the cake. Remembering the way his lips felt, the way he tasted, Katherine's body tingled with sheer happiness. She let one of her hands snake its way up into the boy's hair, where it naturally found itself. She let her fingers lightly entangle themselves into the tresses.

She broke the kiss, looking into his eyes. "God, I've missed you... I've missed this." She then returned the kiss he had given her, equally passionate, letting her tounge casually slide between his lips, craving to relinquish his taste; to refresh her memory.

[milo martin]

Everything in Milo’s body suddenly sprang to life once his lips touched hers. He missed her so much. As they kissed and held each other close, Milo definitely felt tears begin to sting at his eyes. He didn’t try to hide them or wipe them away. These were tears of joy, tears that he wanted to share. He was happy – goddamn it, he was happy. He couldn’t imagine a more perfect moment than this. “I’m glad you’re here to stay. I don’t want to be away from you anymore…I don’t think I can handle it anymore,” he said between kisses.

He pulled away from the kiss and then moved his lips to her neck, his lips soft against her skin. “Kat...I…I don’t know if this is the right time, but…you know, I’ve always been told to follow my heart, and it led me here, to you…and it’s telling me that this is right.” He kissed her again, took her hands into his, kissed her fingertips.

“Katherine, I don’t want to live my life unless you’re in it. I think I’ve made that pretty clear. So…” he took a deep breath and got down on one knee before her, holding her hands still. “I…Katherine, I love you and…and I want you to marry me,” he blurted. “After the tour, and we go to New York. I want it to be official. I want to be with you.” He pressed her hans to his cheek and continued to ramble, “I want to wake up every morning and see you next to me. I want to have a family with you. I want us to forget this whole fucking tour ever happened, and I want you there to help me forget so I never have to drink again. So…marry me?” Milo glanced up at her reproachfully and bit the inside of his cheek.

((ooc: heh, i modified a little bit, i thought of more things to say!))[/size]

[katherine rivera]

“I’m glad you’re here to stay. I don’t want to be away from you anymore…I don’t think I can handle it anymore,” Listening to the words that came from his lips in between kisses, Katherine was happy - happy that he wanted her here... happy that he was pleased. To be wanted gave her a meaning, and she wanted to fill it. And what made it even more thrilling, was that someone like Milo wanted her; someone she never could have imagined knowing, or even being able to get close to, but those barriers didn't matter anymore, and if they arose again, they would find a way around them. There was no more beating around the bush - this was what love was.

Milo then broke the kiss, and moved his lips to Katherine's neck. They felt so warm and smooth against her skin; the feeling was welcomed. “Kat...I…I don’t know if this is the right time, but…you know, I’ve always been told to follow my heart, and it led me here, to you…and it’s telling me that this is right.” Milo kissed her once more, took her hands within his, and kissed her fingertips. Katherine looked at him, still taking in his words, trying to process the meaning. 'The right time for what?' - is what she thought to herself, inwardly. All she could do was nod, and let a small smile birth from her lips.

“Katherine, I don’t want to live my life unless you’re in it. I think I’ve made that pretty clear. So…” Taking a deep breath, the boy before her got down on one knee, holding her hands still within his. Katherine raised her brow; what was he up to? She had no clue - not even the slightest. She awaited for something more to come from his lovely mouth that would give her that clue.

... Little did Katherine know that that clue -actually, the main suprise- was about to hit her, straight on, without a warning.

“I…Katherine, I love you and…and I want you to marry me,” The sentence was blurted out so fast, that it took a moment to truly, truly register with Katherine. When it did, her eyes widened, and her body seemed to freeze itself again. “After the tour, and we go to New York. I want it to be official. I want to be with you.” He brought her hands to his cheek, continuing to talk, while Katherine, still frozen, kept taking it all in. “I want to wake up every morning and see you next to me. I want to have a family with you. I want us to forget this whole fucking tour ever happened, and I want you there to help me forget so I never have to drink again. So…marry me?”

Katherine could see Milo glancing up at her, but she couldn't quite address it just yet. Was she dreaming? Was she hallucinating? This seemed too perfect... almost like, the scene from a movie of some sorts. Had she pictured Milo saying all of that? No - his hands still held hers, and he surely was still there, on one knee before her.

She began to slowly tremble, biting her lip. Her eyes glimmered as new tears began to form within. Man, she hoped she wasn't dreaming, or hallucinating, or getting Punk'd.

"Yes...yes, yes, yes... I couldn't say it enough... I'll marry you, Romeo."

[milo martin]

Milo shocked himself with his own actions sometimes – everything in the past two or three months, his own actions kept him on his toes, everything. But nothing shocked him quite like this.

There was absolutely no doubt in his mind that he loved Katherine, that he wanted to live out the rest of his life together with her, but in no way did he think that he would come out of this wreckage with a promise of her hand in marriage. This was completely unplanned and, to Milo, it seemed…right. He didn’t even have a ring for her, but he knew, in time, that he would present her with the ring she deserved, the best one he could buy.

He tried to concentrate on his breathing as he waited for Kat’s answer. He held her hands in his. His heart fluttered in his ribcage. She bit her lip and Milo could feel her start to tremble. For one fleeting second, he feared that she would reject him. But then…the sweetest words he’d ever heard:

"Yes...yes, yes, yes... I couldn't say it enough... I'll marry you, Romeo."

It was a breath of fresh air, a wave of relief, hearing those words. Suddenly, anything was possible. Milo felt infinite. He broke out into a huge smile, ear-to-ear. He couldn't help but let a few tears escape. He felt one roll down his cheek, but didn't bother wiping it away - he was proud of it.

“Yes? Yes!” he exclaimed. He kissed the third finger of her left hand, where a ring should be. “I love you so much, Kat. I love you. I so wish I had something for you, to put on this finger, but…but I don’t. But I will, one day. I promise.” He kissed her hand again. “You’ve made me so happy, Kat. I’m going to take care of you. I’ll always take care of you.” He stood and gathered her up into his arms again, kissing her lips once more. “I never want to be without you ever again.”

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[katherine rivera]

Upon sounding her reply, Milo exclaimed joyously. He kissed the third finger of her left hand; the finger in which was symbolistic to marriage and commitment. Katherine looked to see tears rolling down Milo's cheeks; they looked to be tears of happiness, as he let them run, rather than rubbing at them, like one would in sorrow. And, the smile upon his face couldn't get any wider - Katherine laughed lightly at this. She hadn't seen him this happy in awhile; actually, this was a whole new level to Milo's version of happy, as she had seen thus far.

“I love you so much, Kat. I love you. I so wish I had something for you, to put on this finger, but…but I don’t. But I will, one day. I promise.” Milo kissed her hand again. “You’ve made me so happy, Kat. I’m going to take care of you. I’ll always take care of you.” The boy came up from his positioning before her and took her back into his arms once more, taking her lips into his before she could get a response out. “I never want to be without you ever again.”

Katherine let her tears escape freely as well, taking in that familiar feeling of protection that she had when in Milo's arms; she fit so perfectly, it was amazing to her. He was amazing to her. Of course, in the back of her mind, she knew that this was a major decision she had made, one that should have been thought on, but what did she have to lose. Nothing else in this world waited for her or promised her anything. Besides - she already promised her heart to Milo a long time ago, and could never take that back. Ever since that fateful fight night in the parking lot, fate intervened and made it that way.

Even if she did have something ahead of her, she probably would end up leaving it or risking it for this boy.

His words, his kisses - they consumed her completely. Not that she cared; he could swallow her up, for all she cared. She'd never want to return to the real world.

Katherine broke the kiss, bringing her arms around his waist and laying her forehead against his. "First of all - I could care less about a ring at the moment, Milo - you are all I need and want." She paused and let her lips brush against his, letting one of her hands slips itself up into his hair once more. "As long as you want me by your side, I'll stay. I'll go wherever you go. I'm yours - you have my all."

She kissed him once more, lingering a bit, nibbling on his bottom lip. "And - I will take care of you, too - forever and for always. And, I promise to be there when you wake up, and to help you forget... you have made me one of the happiest girls alive. You've given me a purpose."

Katherine then buried her face into the nape of his neck, embracing him back. "I love you, Milo Martin - I have loved you, since that night we first laid eyes on one another. Through thick and thin, I always have. And, as days go by, it gets stronger...I love you.

[milo martin]

Milo couldn’t help but let a few more tears escape his eyes as he kissed her again and again, holding her close. They were in their own little world now. Everything else kept moving, but inside their bubble, it was radiating their love. It was the strongest, most fierce thing Milo had ever experienced. It was so fierce and so strong that it scared him. It was precious and beautiful and thrilling and exciting. This was the beginning of something new, and it sent a chill down his spine. He kept thinking that he would all of a sudden wake up, and none of this would be real anymore.

Katherine broke away and wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing her forehead against his. They fit together so well, like two puzzle pieces. "First of all - I could care less about a ring at the moment, Milo - you are all I need and want. As long as you want me by your side, I'll stay. I'll go wherever you go. I'm yours - you have my all." She kissed him again. Her taste was intoxicating to him. He felt lightheaded and giddy. "And - I will take care of you, too - forever and for always. And, I promise to be there when you wake up, and to help you forget... you have made me one of the happiest girls alive. You've given me a purpose."

“I don’t have a lot to offer you, Kat,” he nuzzled her cheek, “but I’m going to give you everything you deserve. Even though I’m not…the richest guy or the one with the biggest apartment – I mean, I live in a three-room apartment in the East Village with no heat or air conditioning – but that’s not always the life we’re going to have. I’m going to treat you like a princess.”

The rest of the tour, he knew, was going to be absolute hell. There was no way they were going to be able to be together without someone getting mad or hurt. It’s a bittersweet symphony, this life, he thought to himself, quoting the old song.

"I love you, Milo Martin - I have loved you, since that night we first laid eyes on one another. Through thick and thin, I always have. And, as days go by, it gets stronger...I love you.”

“Baby,” Milo said with a small smile, “it sounds like you just wrote your wedding vows.”

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[katherine rivera]

“I don’t have a lot to offer you, Kat,” --- “but I’m going to give you everything you deserve. Even though I’m not…the richest guy or the one with the biggest apartment – I mean, I live in a three-room apartment in the East Village with no heat or air conditioning – but that’s not always the life we’re going to have. I’m going to treat you like a princess.” Milo nuzzled her cheek as he spoke. Katherine shook her head slightly.

"I don't care about money, location - I'm not expecting a flawless mansion, you should know that - all the same, three-room apartment and all, it's still a fairytale to me. " Katherine smiled softly and let her hand snake down from his hair, to let her fingers brush his cheek, then his lips, before it rested upon his chest.

Upon hearing her words, a small smile spread upon his face. “Baby,” --- “it sounds like you just wrote your wedding vows.”
Katherine returned that small smile and snorted lightly. "And, of course, I have no paper to write them on."

[milo martin]

“I’m glad you don’t care about either of those things,” he said, “because there’s not a whole lot I can do to change either of those. I mean, obviously, we don’t have to stay there forever…but it’s what we’ll have to deal with for now. I just don’t want you to be too disappointed when I take you there.”

Milo chuckled as he watched her fingers trail from his hair to his face, to his lips then came to rest on his chest. “Well, yeah, no paper is a problem. I’ll try to remember it for you, so that when the time comes, it’ll be perfect.” He ran his fingers through her hair. “So, what do you say we re-claim your luggage and get the hell out of here? I have better things to do than sit around an airport.”

He kissed her once more and then broke away from her embrace so that he could get her bag for her. “The wedding might be a little problem, you know – considering the fact that we’re supposed to hate each other. I’m sorry, but I don’t want Gabe Gray anywhere near the happy event, if it’s all the same to you.” He held out his hand to her so that they could walk out together.

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[katherine rivera]

“I’m glad you don’t care about either of those things,”/ “because there’s not a whole lot I can do to change either of those. I mean, obviously, we don’t have to stay there forever…but it’s what we’ll have to deal with for now. I just don’t want you to be too disappointed when I take you there.”
"I understand completely, Romes. I told you - come what may, I'll take it. I'm not that picky. Besides, when that time comes, you'll probably make fun of me - I'll most likely be utterly astonished by your apartment. I don't want you to change anything."

As he spoke, he ran his fingers through her hair; a gesture that Katherine constantly used when around him and that he seemed to be picking up on, as well. She loved the feeling - everything felt brand new, yet still the same. It was as if her body was re-remembering everything Milo had even said or done to her, but taking it to another level. “Well, yeah, no paper is a problem. I’ll try to remember it for you, so that when the time comes, it’ll be perfect.” / “So, what do you say we re-claim your luggage and get the hell out of here? I have better things to do than sit around an airport.”

Katherine smiled lightly, and let a small giggle escape from her lips. "Well, thank you, my dear. With your help, I could probably remember them - or, I could just think of something else. So that way, it would be a suprise, y'know?" She paused and smiled again; her happiness causing her skin to slightly flush. " But, it doesn't matter... and yes, let's do that."

"Despite the fact this is an airport, I could stay here all night, in truth. Just to get away from that tour for awhile, but - I've been away as it is, and I have a lot of white-lie explaining to do, if you catch my drift." That she did. She'd have to explain to her band about why she had miraculously returned, and what was her inspiration. But, she couldn't give them the straight truth - that's where, the white lie would be pulled. Another thing, upon thinking of it, that hit her full force, was that, once again, she and Milo would be thrown into exile once more.

Even though they were once again close, their bands still separated them. fuck, they'd be lucky to see much of each other, unless they sought hiding within one another's concerts. Biting her lip once more while in thought, she wanted to bring this up, but didn't know how.“The wedding might be a little problem, you know – considering the fact that we’re supposed to hate each other. I’m sorry, but I don’t want Gabe Gray anywhere near the happy event, if it’s all the same to you.” Milo held his hand out to her, to take hers within as they walked. Katherine, still biting on her lip, took his offered hand and laced her fingers with his, lightly squeezing it. Palm against palm - it felt so right.

"I know, I know - that's always a damned problem. Will we ever have peace? Ever? I mean, I am okay with everyone in your band, but - everyone in mine... I just... don't know how it would..." Katherine felt like a Benedict Arnold, betraying her band, and lying to them. But, it seemed that at the moment - it was a necessary sacrifice. This was human nature, after all? If she told anyone in her band, they would flip a lid - well, that, or think she was delusional. Katherine thought of Gabe, as Milo had mentioned him. She hadn't talked to him in ages; she barely could even recall the last time they carried on a conversation.

"Yeah - I don't know how that would go... I just don't know what to do on that subject..." She sighed and looked to Milo, then to their entwined hands. She now had a new thing to think about - band warring.

[milo martin]

“Utterly astonished? Maybe by the size of the cockroaches,” Milo teased. “Well, I guess you’ll just have to wait and find out, then.”

They began to walk out of the airport, hand-in-hand. Milo felt like he was in high school all over again, giddy and excited by love. And she loved him back. Talk about having a reason to live – she was his. He never thought he would ever find his soul mate, and yet here she was, a beautiful shining example, who was not only one of the most gorgeous, kindest and compassionate creatures he had ever come across

“Heh, I hear you there,” Milo responded. “I’d rather stay here too. But I’m afraid we can’t run away just yet. As for the white lies – yeah, you might have some explaining to do, young lady. Did you even tell them you were leaving in the first place? Is everyone wondering where you are right now? What were they going to do without a drummer?”

She mentioned the problem between the bands and expressed her longing for peace. Milo crinkled his brow. “I know how you feel, babe. I don’t know how the rest of the tour is going to go between us. We’re either going to have to come clean or just be really, really careful. I don’t know which is worse – or better. I think even if we come clean, there’s still going to be some animosity. And if we keep it undercover, well, we might live in fear that we’ll slip up and be discovered.”

Regardless, it was going to be difficult, especially if the gossip columns were going to continue to attack them. The longer the tour went on, the less time Milo had to himself let alone get a chance to sneak away with someone else. Sure, they might be able to have a 2am rendezvous at a coffee shop or even risk getting a booth in the back of some nightclub, but the threat of discovery was always going to be hanging over their heads. There was too much hate – their union would most likely never being any sort of alliance.

“Well, you know – if you don’t want to go back to the caravans now,” Milo said softly, “we could always get another hotel room.” He paused and then added on quickly, before Katherine could say anything, “That doesn’t have anything to do with sex. I mean, we don’t have to. I just thought it would be an idea. So we could stay away just a little bit longer.”

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[katherine rivera]

“Utterly astonished? Maybe by the size of the cockroaches,” Katherine snorted a bit, giving him a 'fer real ?' look. “Well, I guess you’ll just have to wait and find out, then.”
"Yes, that I shall... that I shall..." Katherine pondered at the size of these supposed cockroaches. Now that she thought of it, she always heard that New York roaches were quite hefty; she even heard some wackos kept them as pets, and trained them. Perhaps, that would be a future way to make income? Katherine scoffed at herself, and shook the thought away before she thought deeper into it.

Exiting the airport, hands still entwined, it seemed that a lot of weight had been lifted from both of their shoulders. Sure - some still lingered as it always had, due to their situation with their bands, but for the most part, the extra weight seemed to evaporate into thin air. It felt nice - and, it seemed, for both of them, to be a taste of what was normal. “Heh, I hear you there,” / “I’d rather stay here too. But I’m afraid we can’t run away just yet. As for the white lies – yeah, you might have some explaining to do, young lady. Did you even tell them you were leaving in the first place? Is everyone wondering where you are right now? What were they going to do without a drummer?”

"I know that... just... wishful thinking, I guess." At the mentioning of explaining, she groaned, reaching up and pulling her beanie over her eyes with her free hands momentarily, then pushing it up a bit. "You aren't kidding, mister... well, I wrote a note, saying that I was 'taking a break' and heading out for awhile. It depends if they got the note or not - if they did, they may be wondering; if they didn't, I am sheerly lucky." Milo then asked what they were planning on doing without a drummer. "Heheh - uhm, yeah - I never really thought of that, aaannd... they really didn't know they were going to be... er, without one." Busted.

“I know how you feel, babe. I don’t know how the rest of the tour is going to go between us. We’re either going to have to come clean or just be really, really careful. I don’t know which is worse – or better. I think even if we come clean, there’s still going to be some animosity. And if we keep it undercover, well, we might live in fear that we’ll slip up and be discovered.”

Katherine winced at the harsh reality of their situation. It was true; either way, there was no true solution. They were, well, sort of fucked - royally. Basically, the real question was: Pick your posion?. "Really, niether have their attractive qualities... their negativities seem to stand out, by far...", Katherine took a minute to think, and then sighed before continuing to speak, "When it comes down to it - coming clean won't make things better; at least, in a sense. Media will get ten times as ballsy when it comes to pictures, info - serious monging, dude. And, perhaps, it might make some of our bandmates even more... tense with each other?"

"On the other hand - staying secret will be hard as hell, and media still exists, yes, but - like you said, we will be constantly on edge, and perhaps, slip up, and all beans will be accidentally spilt... each choice has a risk; forcing us to take a chance." Katherine shook her head, damning the negativity before them in her head.

“Well, you know – if you don’t want to go back to the caravans now,” / “we could always get another hotel room.” Upon hearing the soft-spoken voice, Katherine turned her sights to him as they walked. She really didn't have the craving to return to the caravans yet - she wasn't ready to get questioned, glomped, or possibly yelled at. That all could wait for awhile, as far as she was concerned. The hotel room didn't sound like a bad idea, anyway -

“That doesn’t have anything to do with sex. I mean, we don’t have to. I just thought it would be an idea. So we could stay away just a little bit longer.” Breaking what must've been a long pause, Milo spoke up again, adding in on his intentions. That subject had never crossed her mind; the only things that laid within her mind were, now, band warring, and their reunion. She hadn't even been this close to him in so long, and it felt wonderful to have the prescence and heat of his palm against hers; the smallest things seemed to be missed, and mattered, most.

Katherine shook her head in agreement, slowly, as she spoke up. "Believe me, sweetie, I really... really don't... and I haven't got to really talk, see, or be with you in ages, so... I am game for that idea, if you are." She was happy that he had thought of the idea; and, she appreciated the fact that he mentioned that it needn't be just for sex.

Alas, she didn't care what they did; just as long as he was there, and he was well, and happy. "If you want to find one, I'll pay up this time - I just got my money back from those tickets, and you paid last time."

[milo martin]

Milo squeezed Katherine’s hand in comfort. “Don’t worry about the money, Kat. Really. I don’t mind. The good thing about airports is that there’s always a Holiday Inn or something close by. I honestly don’t care where we stay, I just want to be close to you for a few more hours.” He leaned in to kiss her cheek. “Let’s get your bags and worry about who’s paying for what later.”

He listened to Katherine weighing the options between their own options – undercover or out in the open? She was right – neither were attractive options. He knew that if Gabe Gray knew about him and Katherine, there might be some pretty bloody battles. It could ruin the whole tour, not to mention their images for the record label, and both bands could kiss the record contract goodbye. Right now, Milo wasn’t feeling very worthy of a record contract anyway. It was a selfish thought, but right now he didn’t want anything. He wanted to fly back to New York right now, with Kat, and forget about everything.

“You’re completely right,” he mused. “Coming clean is almost like putting a target on our backs, and the media is a bitch. They’re all about trying to get after us. Meanwhile, the undercover operation might blow up in our faces. They’re sneaky little bitches, and they’ll never leave us alone. How many times have they hounded a celebrity to the point where they’re actually been forced to come clean? That’s not the way I want this thing to go.” Milo shook his head. “But we’re bugs under the microscope now, whether we like it or not.” He paused. “Um…and I might have, uh…told Alex and Dante that we were together. But I don’t think either of will condemn us, or sell us out to the gossip mags.” He ran the pad of his thumb over the top of Kat’s hand.

“And by the way,” Milo gave her a sideways glance and a smirk as they walked out of the airport. “New York City cockroaches are no laughing matter…”

((new thread, yes?))[/size]